I’m going to take a break from the silly anecdotes for a public service announcement. Possession is a battle among
all some children. They need to be vigilant so that innocent toys do not become sighted in the crosshairs. If only my boys were old enough to read with comprehension, maybe these warning signs might be helpful to save their toys.
1. You picked it up.
It could be a cheap Happy Meal toy that has been buried at the bottom of the toy box for weeks. Once you have it in your hot little hand, it is now the Golden Toy, and has been centered in
your brother’s the Toy Pirate’s spyglass.
2. You flung it under the couch.
The Mommy doesn’t care how much you whine and beg for her to get your toy. Despite a weekly cleaning, the dust bunnies and cracker crumbs congregate under there, so I’m afraid your toy has been lost to the abyss. But if your brother wants said toy, well I suppose the couch can be moved. For him.
3. It’s bedtime.
There is a reason why The Mommy is reading your favorite book to you. If you’re imagining that your transformer is crunching through a city while she’s reading aloud Goodnight, Goodnight, Construction Site, then why is she bothering to lose her voice?
4. You’ve stopped playing with it.
I’m sorry, but the invisible “it’s mine” force field that surrounds your toy as you play, does not extend to it after it’s been discarded. If you’ve moved on, then move on.
5. You’re using it as a step stool.
Um, there is a reason you’re too short to reach those ink pens on that shelf. You get one warning for this infraction. If the step stool toy has wheels, that is grounds for immediate dispossession.
6. It tumbles down the stairs.
The slinky is the only toy exempt from this rule. But seeing as how Charlie pulled it out of shape 10 minutes after it was opened, just remember, no toys go down the stairs on their own.
7. You’re not sharing.
The Mommy doesn’t care who you’re fighting with over the toy. She can magically remove the object of conflict. Poof! Nothing more to fight over!
I’d love to hear from you! What are some other ways toys are “lost”?