Gluten · Writing

Using A Lot of Salt

Hmmm, a bit more, I think…

For the last eighteen years, I never understood the draw to pay close to $100 a ticket to wait on crazy long lines in muggy heat all day long. But then family hit the state and offered to treat us to the Disney World’s Magic Kingdom in Orlando. I really enjoy spending time with my in-laws (seriously, they are awesome people!), so I thought I’d go ahead and brave the crowds this past Saturday simply for the benefit of being with them.

I’d been mildly following the story of the spoiled rotten wealthy socialites in NY who hire disabled people to pose as family members so that they can skip the long lines. I thought, “Boy, if it’s that bad, I’d just skip the whole park even if I had that kind of money. Who needs it?”

I guess I’m not snooty enough. What a shame.

Then, when I started randomly talking about our upcoming trip with people, I started getting advice left and right. It kind of reminded me of my first pregnancy. Everyone always has a special tip or a trick that “really works.”

The grocery store clerk told me about parking in a nearby hotel lot that is walking distance to the gate so we wouldn’t have to pay for parking. A waitress said that International Drive had lots of cheaper gluten-free food than I would find in the park and that I should bring that instead.

Yeah. So, here’s where the salt works in.

All those ideas, even the family poser scam, may seem great before-hand, but honestly, I ended up having an absolute wonderful time without any of that. I never knew that there are free fastpasses for many of the more popular rides. As long as you are willing to do something else (and there is PLENTY to do) until it’s your turn to ride, the most you really spend in line is about five minutes.

Yeah, we ended up paying for parking like everyone else. But you know what? My boys were so excited about riding the tram and the monorail, that they thought we were already IN the park. Okay, so maybe that’s not really worth the price for parking, but to me, their enthusiasm was priceless.

I don’t really care what I Drive has to offer in the way of gluten-free unless I happen to be driving down it. At the Magic Kingdom, I got an awesome bacon chicken sandwich for lunch complete with an Udi’s bun and “safe” fries. For dinner I had a hit-the-spot pepperoni pizza. My food was fresh, not rained on, delicious, and it did not make me sick. ‘Nuff said.

In the meantime, my boys had a blast! William spent half the day hugging babies and pretty girls. He liked Belle so much he made sure to warn her about Ursula who was in The Little Mermaid ride we had just come from. Charlie did not miss anything. He went napless the whole time, and long after his big brother had fallen asleep, Charlie was still up to be “squeaky excited” about the monorail and tram rides back to the car at 11:30.

"My advice to you Belle, watch out for Ursula! She's a bad guy!"
“My advice to you Belle, watch out for Ursula! She’s a bad guy!”

Like anything in life, people will always try to give you “expert” advice. Just be sure to have a large salt shaker to sort out the truth. One bit of advice I wish someone HAD given me… never think there aren’t repercussions for styling your hair with mousse, then wearing it down in Florida weather all day.

*head desk* I’m a native – I should know better. I guess I was too busy salting my other bits of advice…

What kind of advice were you given for a big event? Was it helpful? Did you ignore it? Did you wish you’d followed it?